You can’t control what I write on the internet. You can’t control it, you can’t control it. So go to hell if you want me to uphold the politically correct facade. Why is everything wrong in this world? Why is everything bound and chained.  I know why I like yaoi now, above the fascination with a species of human that I rarely get to be with (MEN). It’s bound in chains. It’s everything that’s right in the wrong world. It’s freedom unleashed. Yaoi isn’t just random friggin gay porn. To me it’s more than that, it’s people connecting despite difficulties, despite taboos, despite ANYTHING. It’s love overcoming, seriously, EVERYTHING. It doesn’t always succeed either. It’s frail and it’s breakable and it’s just like a person’s life.  It’s in a box. And I often feel like I live in a box. The older I get the smaller the box gets, ’till I can’t breath. I’m an artist. You just can’t control an artist and hope it doesn’t break. Artists don’t operate on the same juice other people operate. I don’t feel good when I’m normal! I don’t feel complete when I’m doing what’s expected. I feel awful, god-awful, I would rather DIE sometimes than do the things other people think should make me happy. THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. Let me do what makes ME happy. This isn’t about all of us doing what’s expected. I’m not NORMAL. FUCK NO. Why the hell would I want to be? There are many more weirdos in life, I fit in with THEM! SO!? Sorry, right now I’m venting because life was trying to remind me of everything I “CAN’T” do. And I’m holding it in so it doesn’t burst out, because this only builds up my need for vendetta. And then they ask why people carry chips on their shoulders. Fucking regret. It gets nobody nowhere. Long live Brian Kinney. No Apologies, No Regrets. LIFE just BE that way. GOD.